It is heartbreaking every time we lose the people we have become so attached to and accustomed to, the ones who have become part of why we are who we are now as individuals. We tend to value the things we own because we have created a deep connection with them. Hence, losing someone almost always elicits sadness, frustration, and sometimes, even guilt.
Understanding Grief and Loss
The same goes for when we lose the people we love. We cry. We weep. We grieve for the people we can no longer be with. We grieve for the memories we had, for we no longer can add more to these but only relive each one, wondering why we never spent more time with the person when we still had the chance.
But the thing is, losing is a major part of living, and grief is how we react to it.
Grief Looks Different for Everyone
Grieving is a process that is innately different to and for each one of us. We all know the five stages of grief—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. However, no one person experiences grief all the same, and these stages are not the only paths to acceptance.
Some people only take a few days to go through the grieving process, whereas, for some, it may take weeks or months. Ultimately, no one can dictate how you do it, for your grief is only yours to feel. What you can control instead is how you cope with it.
Ways to Cope with Grief
Reminisce your departed loved ones. Recall the memories you shared with your loved ones—their favorite food, the place you used to visit, or the things you used to do together. Simply bask in the warmth and bliss of that distant memory, and let it be your way of remembering the person and celebrating their life as a reflection of their eternal connection and love for you.
Acknowledge your feelings. You may be wondering why you haven’t shed a single tear, or you may be wondering why you haven’t stopped crying at all. The truth is, both reactions to grief are normal, and you shouldn’t be too hard on yourself for not expressing your feelings the way other people do. Cry it out. Write a journal. Go somewhere you can feel better. Do the things you know can help you feel and express your emotions well.
Connect with your families and friends. As social beings, connecting with others may help a lot with coping. Creating a space where you can spend time with your families and friends, communicate, share hugs, and show affection may help heighten feelings of belongingness and companionship during such an unfortunate time.
Reach out for help. Grief differs for everyone. The same goes for how it affects your mental, emotional, and physical health. When the pain and sadness become too heavy to carry, it may be time for you to seek professional help. After all, having someone to talk to besides your loved ones may help you process your feelings better.
Coping is Not Forgetting
There are so many other ways that can help you cope with grief. And coping does not necessarily mean that you forget the sadness, pain, and heartache of losing someone. What this truly entails is that you can go through this loss and learn to grow around it.
Coping allows you to look back, celebrate, and honor their life, the memories, the person, and how much impact they have left on your life without having to dismiss how you feel within.
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